Carrie Anderson

English Comp.1 E 4.                                                                MARRIAGES

04/30/07 

                 Monogamy results in unhappy marriages due to inequality between partners, lack of attention to their partners, and unfaithfulness. Are couples really and truly happily married? Has marriage in general lost a lot of its morals and values? Is there reasoning behind this? Has its meaning greatly diminished? Have we gone too far with our expectations for the human race?           The news I hear about marriage today are rather negative. People are just plain and simply, not happy in their marriages. These views have totally effected my decision to remain single, at least for now.         

          My parents are still together, but they have their complaints. My mother would probably say for the most part she’s content, but not happily married. She wishes things in her marriage could be more fifty-fifty, with some of the current marital type roles that there are today. The men and women are not labeled to do specific duties according to their gender. She would greatly appreciate it if my dad would get up after dinner, say thank you, and then put the dishes in the dish washer. My father[d3]  would probably enjoy watching my mother clean out the barn with the tractor. Instead, they chose to be somewhat miserable and not say anything to each other about what is bothering them.        

             My own views on marriage aren’t too pretty; I think marriage should only be a five year contract that is only renewable if both parties agree. Maybe then people would understand that humans need to keep trying to somewhat impress their significant other even after the ring is put on the finger. Once couples take their vows they should keep on trying to meet the needs of their significant other. I think people quit trying because they feel as though they have their just reward and don’t need to maintain it in order to keep it. That may make quite a few people think twice about their original decision.         

          I also think people should have to take a class in order to receive a marriage license and then have to take regular courses with their spouse in order to keep or renew it. I feel as though this should be a somewhat of a regulated counseling class that could identify hidden issues that need addressing in order to understand and keep the marital bliss.          

           My family’s spouses are not the best role models for marriage. I have a few extended family members that are not on the same page as their spouses also. They tend to think its okay to drift outside of the fence to see if the grass is greener on the other side and then find out the fence got higher and the gate closed while they were out gallivanting around. My sister-in-law actually wanted my husband so bad that she would get up at 4:30 a.m., just to see him at the assisted living home I owned at the time, before he went to his regular job. One of the elders said to me, “We may be old, but we’re not dead!” This meant he can see what was going on between the two of them and it wasn’t appropriate behavior for two married people that weren’t married to each other. I didn’t even know what was going on until she jumped into our bed with us and wanted to start a three some. I am totally not into sharing my husband; this also was the start of the scenario behind the first marriage going to pieces. This extremely affects everyone that knows these couples, especially the children.         

            My theory about marriage was “until death do us part,” it’s just too bad people can’t shoot your spouse for cheating. I’d much prefer a funeral over going through a divorce any day.There are some crimes of passion laws even in effect today, that are quite lenient when it comes to prosecution. There are also some states that have the law of mental pain and suffering due to a cheating spouse. The People who reside in those states can actually get monies from the outside person if they take away or even have an affair with your spouse. I would have liked to have lived in one of those states when my spouses’ had affairs.           Human beings are not meant to be monogamous by nature; this to me is pretty evident. We were meant to have more than one partner in our life long journey, such as some of God’s other creatures we inhabit this earth with.

           Because of this moral confusion somewhere along the line, society came up with the theory that we should be married for life and screwed everything up. I think it would be very hard to defeat the powers of evolution and nature itself.